Consent Is More Than a Yes: Why It Matters in Psychedelic, Somatic, and Everyday Spaces
Let’s be real—most of us didn’t grow up learning how to talk about boundaries, let alone how to feel them.
We were taught to be nice, polite, go along. In psychedelic spaces, in sex, in relationships, even in healing work… that conditioning doesn’t just disappear. It lives in our bodies.
But what if consent wasn’t just a box to check or a legal requirement—what if it was a practice of power, clarity, and connection?
That’s what we explored recently in our Consent Workshop—both online and in person—with a beautiful, diverse group of folks ready to shift the way they relate to themselves and others.
Here’s a taste of what we shared—and what we’re learning together.
Consent Is Felt, Not Just Said
Consent isn’t just “yes” or “no.” It’s how you know—in your body, your breath, your gut—whether something is truly aligned. And sometimes, you don’t know right away. That’s okay.
We practiced noticing:
When your body says yes… but your words say no
When you’re doing something because you feel obligated, not excited
When you’re waiting for someone else to read your mind (we’ve all been there)
This isn’t about getting it perfect—it’s about learning to listen.
The Wheel of Consent: A Game-Changer
We also introduced the Wheel of Consent—a framework by Dr. Betty Martin that breaks consent into four dynamics:
Giving
Receiving
Taking
Allowing
Most of us confuse these. For example, we think we’re receiving when we’re actually allowing someone else to take. It’s subtle—but powerful.
In psychedelic spaces, especially when people are in altered states, these dynamics matter so much. Facilitators, partners, friends—everyone benefits when we know who something is for, and who it’s really serving.
Boundaries in Altered States
One of the trickiest (and most crucial) parts of psychedelic healing is that it can bring us into deeply vulnerable, suggestible states. That’s beautiful—but also risky.
Consent here means:
Slowing down enough to check in with the body, not just the mind
Making space for change—because consent can shift in the moment
From the Drama Triangle to Empowerment
We also touched on the Drama Triangle—a pattern of victim, rescuer, and persecutor roles—and how it can sneak into psychedelic spaces or healing relationships.
When people are under the influence, power dynamics can shift in ways that feel invisible but leave an impact. That’s why we focus on moving from the Drama Triangle to The Empowerment Dynamic—where we meet each other as co-creators, not saviors or victims.
Practicing Consent in Daily Life
Here’s the real work: it’s not just about ceremonies, workshops, or intimate moments.
Consent is everywhere:
Saying no to a Zoom meeting when you’re maxed out
Checking in before offering advice
Asking a friend, “Do you want support, or just someone to listen?”
It’s a muscle—and it gets stronger the more we use it.
Final Thoughts
Consent isn’t just about safety—it’s about freedom.
It’s the foundation for deeper intimacy, truer self-expression, and more integrity in psychedelic and spiritual spaces. And it’s a lifelong practice. You’re allowed to be new to it. You’re allowed to mess up. What matters is that you keep choosing curiosity over shame, and presence over performance.
If this resonates and you want to explore more—whether in 1:1 coaching, in ceremony prep/integration, or in our next community workshop—you know where to find me.